The view from above

It’s been roughly a few years since I drove a large car. Now, by large, I mean like an oversized van.

I finally managed to hunt down a big truck today for our move tomorrow down south. It seems some fireworks company managed to just up and take 3 U-HAUL’s and 4 Ryder’s worth of trucks, leaving lots of people with last minute reservations in deep doggy doo doo. Luckily, I managed to call a Penske rental place over in Edison which is roughly 15-20 minutes away depending on how bad Route 1 is.

All they had was a monstrous 15′ city truck available to rent and I snagged that big bitch up like it was the last wedding dress in a bridal shop during a 50% off sale. Granted, I have never been to a sale such as that, I hear it’s nothing short of utter chaos and anarchy.

Anyway, I now have a new found respect for any truck drivers out there and I was driving a relatively smaller truck. There’s so much you have to take into consideration when you’re in a large set of wheels. The height of the truck, the fact that you have to stop longer than normal (takes a lot of brake power to slow down them bad boys), much wider turning radii (or is it radiuses) and of course the typical asshole Jersey driver. 😀 Man, are those things tough to get used to!

There are however, some interesting things that I heard about driving trucks as rumor, but now know as truth… For instance, what some people do inside their own cars that you can see from a high and lofty position is pretty amazing. No shitting, I saw:

5 different women fully unclothed from the waist down driving
3 different guys getting oral treats from their passengers
2 different women playing with themselves
1 guy getting a handy from a woman
and…
1 really hairy guy playing with himself (ewwwww)

They were all driving some form of SUV so they just assumed that no one would see them doing these things. However, from my lofty spot, it was as clear as night what was going on in their autos even though all of their windows were tinted. If any of you think simply tinting your windows will allow you privacy to do certain things in your car, you better not hope the person looking in does not have polarized sunglasses. We can really see every single thing inside your car… That is if you don’t have a polarized coating on your tints, which kinda wreaks havoc on us polarized sunglass wearers. I wonder what I’ll be spotting once I drive down to our new place tomorrow. Heh heh heh…

Back to packing…

One reply on “The view from above”

LOL oh man I can’t believe that stuff happens! I know the oral does, but I didn’t know self love occurs en route. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa! All of that is just crazy. No wonder big rig drivers are pervs. All they see all day is perverted stuff.

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