Bunghole stretcher?

Devina just e-mailed me this and after yesterday’s court antics I couldn’t help but laugh:

While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 10 mph over) I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge. The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me, “What’s the hurry?” I replied, “I’m late for work.”

“Oh yeah,” said the cop, “what do you do?” I responded, “I’m a rectum stretcher.” The cop said “What…..a rectum stretcher, and what does a rectum stretcher do?” I said, “Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand, then I work until I can get both hands in there and then I slowly stretch it until it’s about 6 foot wide.”

The cop asked me, “What the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?” I simply replied, “You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge…”

The ticket – – $ 95.00
The look on his face – – PRICELESS