On my way home from work today, I was listening to the radio and it turns out Q Magazine put out their list of the greatest one hundred singers of all time. I’m left wondering who the hell picked these people because most of them don’t even deserve to be on a list of the top give hundred in my opinion. Rounding the top ten are:
- Elvis Presley
- Aretha Franklin
- Frank Sinatra
- Otis Redding
- John Lennon
- Marvin Gaye
- Kurt Cobain
- Robert Plant
- Mick Jagger
- Jeff Buckley
Now you’ve got to be freaggin’ kidding me, Elvis Presley??! Kurt Cobain?! FUCKING Mick Jagger?!!! What is this, a popularity contest?
Elvis was a horrendous singer, although he was a terrific entertainer. I mean you still have a buncha yokels who worship the ground that man walks on and are convinced he’s still alive somewhere and collecting food stamps to feed his fat ass. John Lennon was an amazing song writer, though as a singer… Ummm no. Kurt Cobain had an interesting singing voice, though comparing him to Aretha or Marvin is completely apples and oranges. I’ll put him towards the bottom of the one hundred… Hell, Thom Yorke or Chris Cornell completely pwn Kurt’s singing abilities beyond a question of a doubt. So who is the asshat who put Jagger in that list?? He’s a great showman and one of the most entertaining front men of all time, but singer? A dead parrot sounds better than him… As far as Robert Plant? I’m on the border with him. I mean he could scream a good game, but singer? Meh. I’ll give that one to ya.
I will most definitely agree with Sinatra, Franklin, Redding and Gaye, though where’s Whitney Houston? Sure, she likes taking a hit from Mr. Brown and the crack pipe in one fell swoop, but she had one amazing singing voice. What happened to AL GREEN? Where’s Freddie Murcury? Stevie Wonder? Ella? Heck, Fiona Apple’s better than half that list up there. While I am in no way an R&B fan, where’s Mary J. Blige? She’s got a rather nice singing voice and can belt out a good tune or two. Where’s Nina Simone or Etta James? Even though I loathe her with a passion, but I’m very surprised Celine Dion’s not on the top ten. Sheesh… Heck, if I had my choice I’d even throw in Natalie Merchant or even the lead singer of Skid Row, Sebastian Bach. Yeah, you might scoff at me, but I’ve seen that guy up close and personal in a couple of Broadway shows and that boy can muddafreaggin’ sing his ass off.
So what’s your take on these folks listed as the best ten singers of all time?